Scene: Auto Body & Custom Car Audio Shop in Napa, CA.
The day is hot out. Mechanics have on short sleeves, showing tattoos. Thick wafts of spanish.
Stereo decks twinkle beautifully on a back wall, neon washes out beneath displays. Calendars show import models leaning seductively, hooking their thumbs into lacy undergarments.
Me: "I want to put a new stereo system in it."
Oscar: "Nice man, you've come to the right place. What were you thinking about?"
Me: "I want it to be loud."
Oscar: "Excellent! Do you know much about car stereos? What's your price range look like?"
Me: "Price is not an issue here. It never has been. I want the car stereo to be extremely loud and I'm hoping you can help me."
Oscar: "Okay man, definitely. There's really a lot of options open to you if price is not an issue. Your rig definitely has the space to put whatever kind of amps and power extenders you need, plus there's room for.."
Me: "I want the stereo to draw blood."
Oscar: [stares questioningly]
Oscar: "I'm sorry man, what was that?"
Me: "I want the music to go so loud that it hurts you. I want flecks of paint to blow off the car. If you're driving and listening to music and the windows are up, I want the speakers to be so loud that you have to go to the dentist after."
Oscar: "..."
Me: "I've been hurt recently. My life is in many pieces. I want the music to play so loud that it cleans me, physically. Blows that first layer of my skin off. Creates uncomfortable pressure on my internal organs. So loud that I cannot hear myself think, that the blood in my brain is suspended and disrupted by the rattling. Is there space in the car for that kind of power supply? Will I have to weld the trunk shut completely?"
Oscar: "Holy shit man. You're really serious."
Me: "I'm really serious Oscar. I've been in pain and I'm ready to wash myself. I want the music to hurt my eyes. Ghost by Oliver Heldens. 146 decibels."
Oscar: "You'll have to install some pretty massive battery and copper conduit systems to generate that kind of amperage."
Me: "I'm ready to install a nuclear reactor if that's required. This is my last option and I need your help."
atm1
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